How to Gain Confidence.

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Growing up being a piece of brownie I had troubles facing the world. Especially when I entered in my teen years. Pimples, spots, etc made their grand entry and the world got meaner. And back then when someone would want me to be in front of the camera, I always covered my face or turn it into a black and white photo so nobody would know my real color or see how dark my spots were.

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However, now it’s a completely other scenario. I am very confident about myself. The way I look, talk, smile and even come in front of the camera all the time basically.

Since then to now I’ve learnt a few things.

1 – The most important thing is to love yourself! Until and unless you don’t love yourself, nothing about yourself will make you happy. Love yourself no matter what because nobody can you more than you! And I’ve personally learnt that myself. I used to hate myself, every little thing about myself but then I realised it was doing no good. So one day I just stopped thinking bad things about myself and wrote down things I loved about myself everyday. Soon I actually started seeing the good in me.

2 – The next thing is Make a List of things you want to improve about yourself. Like I wanted to have a healthy glowing skin so I started having a day and night skincare routine. Make that list and start doing them one by one. And as you go on, scratch them of your list. At the end of the year you’ll see your own improvement. Writing things you want to see in yourself and seeing the list everyday while be a constant reminder and soon you’ll see the improvements in yourself.

3 – “People talk.” Accept the fact. They’ll talk in front of you and behind your back, so Never Ever pay attention to them! That’s what mostly gets a person down. Not everybody is like you, nor will they get what you might find beautiful. Trust me I’ve had the same problem, and still go through it. When I try a makeup look which is not usually done, some people see at as art and love it but some think I am crazy. I have stopped paying attention to them. I look at their comments and smile knowing not everybody will have a mind like mine. That’s how much confidence I have in myself. Though there was time when a word could make a whole lot of difference and immediately changed my mind forever but that’s been weak. We are not weak! People who say mean things are weak! Doesn’t matter if you are the only one who would wear it, do it, etc but always be that ONE! YOU ARE MORE THAN THOSE COMMENTS.

4 – Always be thankful to your critics. I’ve had friends who were ashamed to tell their friends that they talked to me. That made me cry. They didnt say it in my face but nobody’s that stupid. But I am soo thankful to all of them who were ashamed or commented because now they are like WOW! Make the regret! I know I said not to pay attention to such comments and yes dont! But prove them wrong always. I love proving people wrong. The more they say I cant or I am not able to. The more I work only to throw it on their face. This not only gives you the happiness but mostly makes you a stronger and confident being. People who once thought I was too dark and dirty now praise me. Accept rejections like a princess but come as the Queen who owns the place.

5 – Do what you love and wear what you’re comfortable in. Find your style ( that is another whole post that I’ll post soon). I remember being a teenager I would always go with the trend even if I didnt like it. Or that one thing mainly happens with every teenage girl…liking whatever your crush likes so that he likes you back. I did that to. I would make his favourite color mine even though it wasn’t. I would make his favourite songs my playlist but I forced myself to like it. Why? Because I wasnt confident enough to show the real me knowing he wouldn’t like it. Thinking about it now makes me cringe but smile too. I wish I had someone to tell me back then. We are all unique in our own ways and being confident in ourselves makes our personality stand out and spark amongst all of them.

6 – Smile more! Yes. That is soo important. Nowadays we dont smile much. Its always a pout or a funny face. Smile in your pictures, smile at people who loves you, who dont love you. Just smile. You’ll instantly feel happy. And being happy with oneself helps bringing confidence. I hated smiling at pictures because I thought my smile made me look even more ugly but no smile is ugly. Every smile is different and soo very beautiful. Just look at the mirror every morning and stop pointing out what new acne appeared but smile and say out loud, ” You’re so beautiful.” You’ll have the best day.

7 – And Fake it till you make it. Always..always. When you start to fake that you love yourself, your mind starts thinking as if it is the ultimate truth and starts working like that. When you make your mind hate yourself then obviously you can undo it. Even with photos, start faking like you’re the next top model and soon you will see the changes on how confident you look on every photo. I do too. I look at the camera as if I was born a star. Yes it doesn’t happen in a day but gradually it does.

 

These were my tricks on growing my self confidence and loving myself for who I was. If you have any other tricks please comment down below so that everyone can know and have a great loving community.

 

Debo x

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Trip to Shantiniketan.

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This year I have decided to explore and travel more. In the past years because of my anxiety I’ve had problems with going out and travelling. But last year I had a lot of improvement and this year I want to get better.
So my first outing of the year was to Shantiniketan, hometown of Bengal’s Pride, Rabindranath Tagore.

I went with my family and my dad’s office friends. The place is soo calm and at peace. Everything seems like art there. There is a Saturday fair named as Shanivaar Haat. And people come and sell their amazing talents. They have their folk songs and dances going on to. Everybody is invited to join in. Their behaviours, welcoming attitude, love and hospitality will make you not want to leave.
We went there for a day. A very long, 3 hour drive but it was totally worth it. Me and mum didn’t even want to come back. We shopped a little and wanted to do more.

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I really enjoyed the first trip of this year. I am also getting better with going out, travelling more and meeting people.

There are more travel posts to come.

Where is your first trip of the year?

What 2017 taught me.

2017 was one heck of a year! And it has taught me a lot of things before ending. I feel every year passes only to teach you a lesson, its like a chapter ends with a moral. This year I have learnt to let go. Let go of things that has been holding me down from things that I can do and be happy. I have learnt to let go of feelings that was there only to hurt me, I have learnt to let go of people who would bring negativity in my life. Although I have learnt to let go, I have also learnt to love and be grateful of the littlest things in life. Even if its a sunny day after really bad rainy days. Once you become grateful, I feel things get simpler and lovelier. I fell in love with myself and with my dreams all over again. I have made better relations with my family by taking out time and going out with them, going to meet them, etc. I have also learnt to not give a f***. Previously everybody’s thoughts would hold me back from doing things I wanted to, I loved to. One of the things being racist comments. I would not wear clothes that would show more skin than usual whereas I dreamt of wearing clothes I designed. However, this year I came out of it. I wore my designed gown, a backless gown. And not just wore it, I walked around the city with a high head.

I feel I have gained a lot of self respect, self confidence, power, love and positivity for myself. I have stopped pitying myself and learnt to live and enjoy. And absolutely not care about what others might say or think. I know people near and dear to me will always want me happy and I feel I am at this certain age where even if I make mistake I’ll be mature enough to handle it in a good way. Talking about that also reminds me that I have overcome another huge issue, Social Anxiety. not fully, but a lot. The anxiety that I had earlier was soo bad that I used to panic before meeting people I loved and performing in front a lot of people would be a nightmare to me. But I went out for drinks, met new people from college, made new friends, hung out more, most importantly did 2 fashion show held in our college. I am a lot more organised now too. I feel organisation is needed in life. Not to mention I have my own Monica Geller mode, where I make lists and then sub lists of those lists and colour coordinate, etc etc. Yeah…I am that crazy.

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However all those lists and colour coordination has also helped me whenever I have felt like I am off the track because I wasn’t always on the track, I did fluctuate but I knew and was ready for it. Because that’s normal. I cant demand more than I can do at once or else it would have overwhelmed me. But whenever that happened, lists happened. I made lists of things that I was doing that I shouldn’t and the reason behind it. Then I would work on the reasons one by one. Writing down the problems, finding out the reason behind it and breaking it down helps the most to get rid of it.

All over I am really happy with myself and proud. I have laughed more than I have cried. Especially the end days I had cried laughing which is the best way to end the year! I have smiled and laughed reading text messages, I have literally fallen over and laughed. From what I remember, 2017 has made me a better, positive, strong human being. And 2018 will make me even better.

What did 2017 teach you?

First Fashion Show

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Recently I had a project assigned to us by our teachers to style up 2 members from each group. I and my friend had to dress up as people from 1920s. I dressed up as the famous Flapper Girl from that era and my friend dressed up in men’s wear because thats the era when Coco Chanel brought the menswear for women. It was hard to make that flapper but we managed it, kind of.

This was my first fashion show ever, and I haven’t been this scared. But I did it ( I wasnt Kendall Jenner but I did it! 😀 ) The moment I walked up to the end point and saw all the cameras and lights in front of me, kid you not it made me weak from waist below. But I managed with a smile while looking at nowhere to distract myself and walked away. I did make mistakes, but we learn from it. I did want to be a runaway model when I was a kid but with time it changed. However, the main part for me was that I came out from my comfort zone and did it. Having anxiety and doing something like this is a little nerve-wrecking.

But at the end of the day, I am really happy and proud of myself for doing this and smiling it away. 🙂

Peshwai for Ganesh Chaturti

 

 

Ganesh Chaturti is knocking on the door already. The start of all festivals for Indians. Now soon Navratri and on it will go. However, when we think about Ganesh Chaturti all that comes to our mind is Maharashtra’s Ganesh Chaturti. Hence, Peshwa Ganesh.

Now lets come to the point..I love how Maharashtrian women dress up in their regional way. And when the famous movie Bajirao Mastani movie released, I freaking loved Priyanka Chopra’s Kashi Bai look! ❤ So for this Ganesh Chaturti I decided to go Peshwai with a Nauvari style saree.

This saree was actually a gift from my dad to my mom. A famous fabric for saree called Kanjivaram. As it is known that girls have eyes on their mom’s wardrobe, I always had an eye on my mom’s Kanjivaram. ( can’t help it! its soo royal and gorgeous. )

So I wore the Kanjivaram draped into Nauvari style. Accessorised myself with the famous Maharashtrian nath (nore pin), A long necklace paired with a choker necklace, a pair of earrings, some bangles and the lovely bindi on my forehead. The half moon style or an alphabet from Hindi/Bengali language called Chandra Bindu. It was soo hard to draw it on my forehead. Hats off to the ladies who do it with such perfection. ❤ I also made a bun behind my head and twisted a bit of my front hair and pinned it behind. Also pinned some red flowers (fake) beside the bun.

Maybe the draping wasnt fully correct but still for the time being I am really happy with this look. 😀

What are your plans for Ganesh Chaturti? How excited are you?

Things that I am wearing :

  • Saree – Kanjivaram from South India.
  • Long Necklace – Zaveri Pearls.
  • Choker Necklace – Zaveri Pearls.
  • Earrings – a little shop near my house
  • Bangles – Street side shop
  • Nath (nose pin) – Amazon.in

 

Finding Inspiration

Sometimes in the run we generally lose track and inspiration. I guess everyone does once in a while, as for me I have such situations frequently. Its difficult to keep track as planned because not always will things happen our way. But then that’s normal and this is how life is supposed to go on. However, one needs to restart again if fallen back. That’s when sometimes you need a little help/nudge to move a step forward. I fall of track very easily and I get irritated with that kind of lifestyle so I immediately stop and wash my brain fully. This is what I do when I know I have fallen out and I want to refresh my surrounding and self.

  1.  Writing it down and facing it – The first step is to sit down, grab a piece of paper/notebook/journal and a pen. Then simply write down everything that has been in your mind. Be honest to yourself and just write down everything that has been troubling you and for which you couldn’t focus on stuffs that you wanted to. Keep digging through your mind and get to the core if necessary and find EVERYTHING that has been a pain in your a**. It can be anything, and whatever you’re writing down, its for your eyes only. While writing down you’ll find there are soo many things in your mind that you didn’t even know consciously. You can type it on your phone/laptop but I’d personally suggest to write it down on a paper. As you start writing down all your problems, you come face to face with it and now you consciously know what’s been in your mind for a while. Be honest with the writing and be brave when facing it.
  2.  Find the reason – The next step is to ask yourself, WHY? Why is it that you’re thinking about whatever you’ve written on paper? What’s the reason behind all the fuss? Ask yourself out loud. You will have your answer, so keep thinking and ask your conscious self that is it really worth all the attention that it is getting? Because sometimes its not even worth all the attention to a particular topic, however our minds do pay a lot of attention to some problems. And if there is attention needed then find the solution to your problem. Write it down and just do it and erase it from your mind. Ask yourself questions like : Why is it that you’re thinking about it? Does it need this much of attention? If yes, then what could I do to solve it? What could be the reason behind this? Ask such questions to your conscious self and you’ll find your answer. 
  3.  Take time off –  After you’re done with questioning yourself, take some time off.  Leave everything behind and just do things that wont include all your worries and troubles. Things that you love and enjoy doing, do all that. Maybe go on a small trip/drive/trek. Have holiday, paint, complete a whole Netflix series, go out watch a movie, have a fancy dinner, throw a party, have a spa session, etc. Do anything that you would love and that would divert your mind and give it a fresh atmosphere to breathe. The mind sometimes need to relax and chill. That’s like the government of our whole body, so it too needs to breathe and for that you need to take some time off and give it a rest. Give your mind a long holiday till the time you think its okay. As you’ll let it chill, it will do so and once it’s fully relaxed, your mind will want to start again. Its all fresh and filled with all new energies and all set to keep its feet on the next step.
  4.  Lights, Camera… – You’re nearly done now. This is my favourite part, as you have a whole new energised mind who is ready to start working again. Get your planner out and organise! I love organising! Make your To-Dos, plan ahead for the month, make list of goals you need to accomplish, etc. De-clutter if needed, because sometimes de-cluttering helps. This step is like getting ready before your shoot. Check every little details and then ACTION!

You now a have completely new slate to work on. You’ll feel more inspired and motivated than before. Do this whenever you’ll feel you’re falling of track and feeling uninspired. One always needs to feel inspired for not to just work but work and improve. Let me know if you try this, I do when I happen to face such problems. I’d love to know what you do too. Hope this helps to people in need of this.

Take Care ❤

Debo x

An Outfit Brighter than the Sun.

Summer in India is a well-known topic to talk about. Its FREAKING hot and sunny. All we wanna do is stay home and have ice-creams, cold drinks, go for a swim, etc. However, one needs to go out even if its sunny and hot. As for me I love Summer! ❤ That’s my favourite season to be honest. And with summer it feels like one should dress accordingly. Happy & Bright! 😀

 

Outfit Details –

 

 

Losing what once was mine.

Nope, this is not about someone I love or loved. This is about me, somewhere along the road of life I’ve lost a part of me from myself. A part I am known for, I am praised for and a part I am proud of. My ability to draw, create a piece that was never created before. Since childhood day I’ve been known for my art in school except the naughtiness.

However, with social media rising so fast I too became a victim to it and lost my talent. I never like to blame someone or something so blaming social media isn’t a reason. It’s my fault. I have been soo busy handling my Instagram aesthetics, my Snapchat stories, posing for the right Facebook dp, that I forgot about the pencil and paper that once held all the stories of my life. Anything big or small would come onto paper and be saved as a memory. My anger, pain, love or any celebration would come onto paper and still live forever. But now, they still live on my social media pages but with a pose for aesthetics,a lot of edits, hashtags, Pinterest copy pasted quotes that at the end it becomes fake and less lively.

I became soo busy that now when I hold the pencil and try drawing, all I have is a blank paper staring back at me. I ignored it soo much that my talent is now ignoring me. I can still draw but only if that’s copying from another picture and sadly this has also affected my designing career. Its painful than a heartbreak, a broken heart will heal with time but how do I get back my own talent. I can feel my heart crying and cursing me when I sit down to draw and end up tidying everything again. Its painful to watch that white paper staring back at me everyday. One would say, “Just practice and you’ll get it back.” But an artist can never be forced to create something. An artist needs a reason to create, an Inspiration to create and I have lost it. For the past few days I have stopped talking to people, though if you follow me on Instagram then you’d see me uploading pictures daily but always remember social media shows what that person wants to show.

I have this faint little voice in my head saying, ” You’ve lost your inspiration. You can no longer draw, no longer create but copy.” I am scared, sad and angry all at once. I am continuously forcing my brain to come up with something but when its time to do it on paper, I cant! This has been happening from a few months, and I didn’t understand at first. I drew a few stuff but was never pleased and slowly I couldn’t draw a line. I used to draw soo much that I would get migraine because I wouldn’t get up for 4 hours straight and be into it soo much. I thought broken hearts were painful but nothing can beat this pain. The pain of your own talent turning its back on you.

As you may know I have never been to any art classes. What I create comes from the heart or a memory captured on paper. To many my art has flaws but to me its perfect. And now that its angry with me. I just dont know what to do. Should I stop trying and give up? But I never give up. Maybe, I’ll take a break and get away for a while. I don’t know but if possible, I’ll keep you updated. 🙂

Take Care ❤

Debo x

Inside the Perfume Booth

Lately I’ve been loving a bit of perfumes. To be honest, I’ve never paid much attention to that area. I let my mum do that for me. I always tell her to get such scents that doesnt make me sick or give me a migraine. I cant bear really strong scents in short.

So recently I discovered a new brand, Perfume Booth. They have a pack called Perfume Selfie, where there are 7 different perfumes. They have 6 ranges for the Perfume Selfie Sets.

  • Lurve Women
  • Sophistique Women
  • Teaze Women
  • Wyld Men
  • Mazculine Men
  • Cazanova Men

I have tried the Lurve Women one. And, Oh My God! I love every smell. All of them have a very fruity and floral scent which I do love. They arent that strong but once its on, people will know you’ve got something good on you. The 7 perfumes that I received are :

  • Maryaj Viveca – Viveca has Neroli, Bitter Orange, Rasberry, Orange Flower Absolute, Jasmine Absolute, Patchouli, Honey and Amber in it. The smell of it is tantalizing and charming with a sparkling personality that would make you feel young and light hearted.
  • Louis Cardin Gold – This one contains Lime, Lemon, Orange, Pineapple, Rose, Jasmine, Lavender, Artemisia, Iris, Sandalwood, Patchouly, White Musk and Vanilla. Now you can imagine how amazing this one smells! The warm touch of orange and spices like Vanilla, Saffron and Cloves will attract the senses with the very first spritz of this bottle.
  • Emper Lady Presidente – This has Coconut, Musk and Sandalwood, Lotus, Water Lily, Rasberry, Mango, Nectarine and Blood Orange. Having a spritz of this perfume will be like the embodiment of power with an energetic mix of floral and fruity notes. One can easily seize the day confidently with this bold, daring fragrance.
  • Parfums Lomani Paris Sensual – This has notes of Aldehydes, Fruity green, Jasmine, Lily, Orange, Spicy, Sandalwood, Cedarwood and Vanilla. Personally, I love this one the most. Having the notes of Ylang- Ylang, Vanilla and Musk makes it even more attractive. If you really like sensual and an extremely feminine scent then you’ll love this!
  • Emper Chiffon – Now this one is also a favourite of mine because it has a fresh fragrance which makes it perfect for Summer & Spring! ( 2 of my favourite seasons! ❤ ) This has notes like Vanilla, White Musk, Jasmine, Rose, Orris, Sandalwood, Mandarin Orange and Bergamot. Though I am not a huge fan of rose scents but this one will be a first.
  • Chris Adams True Reflection – This has a deep aroma of Blackcurrent and Pomegranante, with the mixture of romantic Rose and curious Lemon. This smell is meditative. This contains notes of Lemon, Red Current, Blackcurrent, Raspberry, Rose Petals, Pomegrannate, Violet, Cedarwood and Musk. This has a mixture of woody and fruity scents.
  • Baug Sons Creation Pour Femme – I really like this one too. This one’s got notes of Litchi, Golden Quince, Kiwi, Jasmine, White Chocolate, Orris Root, Musk and Woods. This fruity-floral fragrance is a cross between softness, magic and sensuality – a modern love elixir locked in a bottle.

This also comes with a handy little case where you can put your perfume of the day and take it with you. I guess that makes it even better. I love how the company has put soo much thought into it because generally its a little hard to carry your perfume bottle with you everywhere. I am gonna take full advantage of this case. What about you?

If you’re a perfume lover, I am sure this will be you’re buddy. Go get your Perfume Selfie.

Debo x

Down the memory lane ft. Paper Boat.

When we were all small all we wanted was to grow up. And now that we’ve grown up all we want is get back to our childhood. But that’s never coming back, is it? Thinking about it reminds me of Peter Pan.

But a few days back I got in touch with Paper Boat and they’ve sent me a pack full of childhood memories. This book “Half Pant Full Pant” written by Anand Suspi will really take you back to your childhood. This book is published by Paper Boat who brings back memories with their variety of juices.

This book contains little stories from Anand Suspi’s childhood which will immediately make you go back into your childhood. During my school days I remember as a kid I loved the Malgudi Days and if you have read that and loved it. Then you’re gonna love this book too. Every little story would remind you of some incident that may have happened in your childhood days. I absolutely recommend this book. ❤

And to enjoy the old memories have a drink from Paper Boat’s variety of juices. As for me, I enjoy Aam Panna and Jaljeera the most. But at this season, nothing can beat the taste of some Alphonso Aam! 😀 Childhood memories in mind and heart when reading the book and the taste of childhood memories while drinking. ❤ Best way to spend some alone time. ❤

Have you read this book? What is your favourite drink from Paper Boat?

Take Care ❤

Debo x